Colton Haynes is speaking publicly for the first time about his father committing suicide.
‘I’m the last person in the world who would say, “Oh, my dad – pity me.” But I was told that my dad killed himself because he found out I was gay,’ the actor tells Out Magazine in an interview posted today.
‘So, of course, I lost it and was like, “How could you say something like that?” And no one will ever really know the truth. But my brother and my mom went to pick up my dad’s stuff, and the only picture on his fridge was my eighth-grade graduation picture. So I was just like, Fuck.’
His father, William, had committed suicide by swallowing roughly 40 oxycodone pills during a time when a then-teenage Haynes had run away from home for three weeks.
Haynes, now 28, had hit a rough patch after coming out to family and classmates at age 14 which led to an estrangement from his mother.
The former Arrow and Teen Wolf star says he’s been dealing with anxiety issues since the fifth grade and his condition was exacerbated by feeling he had to stay closeted to have a successful career as an actor.
‘I feel really bad that I had to lie for so long,’ says Haynes, who came out publicly in April.
‘But I was told that was the only way I was going to be successful. When you’re young in this industry, people take advantage of you, and they literally tell you that your dreams are going to come true. If you believe that, you’ll do anything. And you do believe it, especially if you’re from Kansas.’
Because of his anxiety issues, Haynes quit both Arrow and Teen Wolf. But he returns to series television this fall for season two of Scream Queens.
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